The Frailty of Wanting

The frailty of wanting

It all seems easy and reachable

Just because

Wanting is easy and reachable -

While expecting tender thoughts

made of hopes and golden garlands,

To become as reachable

And as vivid

as the feeling of a rough, cold wind

hitting the back of your neck,

Or the hot and harsh grinding of skin

when all you had to do was

to watch where you were going before tripping

and falling

face against the brutal pavement -

The frailty of wanting

equals nothing and equals everything

Because you still wish to feel pain

As much as you wish to be loved

But never wish to see the clear sign of the rope

that ties

One end

to the other.

The violence of a heartbeat

I'm not afraid of the violence present in the passion of a heartbeat, the very moment between now and later when everything will be rearranged to look like that very thing I wish to stay away from: the analyzing, constant humanizing of pure animal behavior. I'm not afraid of things I desire, I fully understand the consequences of wanting. The spark of life generated in the moment of idealization, the true recognition of reality without rationalization living in the drip drip drip of sweat, blood, saliva. I accept challenges that may only run deep into my own roots and veins, challenges perpetuated by the restlessness of those who do not seek but generate the seeds of all ordeals and nightmares behind wishing... I embrace the wholeheartedly, the mighty in life, mild in manners, I live for those who fully understand the meaning of craving - even though meanings have nothing to do with the heart of the matter... I do.

***

picture here.